Friday, May 23, 2014
I love Tyrion. not as much as Snape, but he's up there. After his speech a few episodes ago I wouldn't be surprised if Peter Dinklage wins another Emmy. But as much as I love Game of Thrones this post isn't about that. It's about chronic illness.
Lately I've been trying to look at being chronically ill, at being a spoonie, as a neutral fact. Obviously being chronically ill sucks, but the label shouldn't be seen as something bad. It's not a statement of my character. It's not something to be ashamed of. I feel bad enough because of my illnesses I shouldn't let other people's reaction to said illnesses make me feel even worse.
I am chronically ill. I am a spoonie. I am disabled. No I don't work, no I have no current plans to finish my degree, no I don't know when I will get better. I may never get better, and that's not my fault. I'm not a stay at home wife, that's just a cover because telling the truth makes people uncomfortable. Well tough, I don't want to hide who I am or pretend I'm something I'm not. It's not like people won't talk anyway.
I've been out of work since 2011. I shouldn't have been working before that. I am currently trying to get on disability but that is an up hill battle. There are a lot of misconceptions about endometriosis and I am on the more severe side of things. I also have several other health problems on top of that, some of which they are able to count and some they are not. But regardless of what the government tells me, regardless of what the lawyers say, I am disabled. And that is okay. I am learning to say that with my head held high.